I was always eager to grow up when I was a kid. I think most kids are. I grew up in a family of adults and I was the only kid around. When I would be standing among a group of adults, I would get really bored because there’s nothing happening at my eye level. All I’d see is their legs…And hear their voices. I’d try to make sense of what’s happening in their higher world by trying to stretch my neck as much as I could.
Fast forward 20–25 years later…Here I am all grown up. Am I happy about it? I don’t know. Though, I do miss living a carefree kid’s life sometimes. But I have realized one little thing about growing up. That I thought would share. Not because nobody knows it, but because I want to.
So here’s the thing about growing up. It’s not a stage or a milestone or a point in life. It’s a journey. You grow till the last day of your life. For some, the growth is really fast…For some, it’s way too slow. I grew up more in the last year and a half than I probably did in 5–10 years before that, when I was caught up in the mad rush of life, college, jobs, etc. But the last year has been more peaceful and shall I say more forgiving. I’m coming to terms with who I really want to be. Learning the things that I want to learn, not something that the world thinks I should learn, understanding people and doing the things that I want to do. In short, I’ve reflected on my life, grown and what I’ve learned is that…It’s all okay.
- It’s okay to not have things turn out the way you imagine. Trust, that you will be fine eventually. Life is not your imagination and life is certainly not perfect. But, it’s beautiful complete with all the good and not-so-good experiences that come with it.
- It’s okay to not have everything figured out when you’re 20, 30 or even 40. It’s okay to lose everything — money, love, and success and to start afresh. At what age? At any age!
- It’s okay if your parents were not how you imagined them to be. They did their best and hey, they are humans too. Parenthood doesn’t make anybody perfect. Stop blaming them for the way your life shaped up. Remember, you are too strong and fully capable of designing your own life, any way you want, anytime you want.
- It’s okay to cry. More than okay. In fact, crying is good. I’m not the only one saying this, Science says it too…So, if you feel like crying at times, go ahead and do it. Don’t ever feel sorry for wanting to cry. And it’s not a sign of weakness. Nope!
- It’s okay to be heartbroken, not once but many times. It’s a part of growing. What’s important is to put your heart out there again, to love and be loved.
- It’s okay to not achieve the things that society wants you to achieve. Getting a high-paying job by 25, settling down by 28, having kids by 30, and so on. Each life is different and so are their milestones. Nobody should decide them for you, but you.
- It’s okay if no one understands you. But, make sure you understand yourself and that you stand by you. People, who matter, will eventually realize that you’re right. You’re not at the mercy of anybody’s acceptance of you, your ideas, or thoughts.
- It’s okay to fail. When I was younger, I was very competitive. I wanted to excel in everything I did. Be at the top. But, then I realized much later that the urge to win at everything was putting me through unnecessary pressure. And who remembers your wins anyway? If I compete with someone and win a competition, there would still be many others who’d be better than me. But, if I compete with myself, the winner is always going to be me!
- It’s okay to say sorry. Really, it’s not a big deal and makes everyone involved feel better than before.
- It’s okay to hate, but remember to forgive eventually. Hatred doesn’t harm anybody, but you. And I know, this is easier said than done. Trust me on this. I’ve dealt with hatred so bad that I thought I’d have to die with it. It drained me of all of my energy every time I thought about it. But, then I learned that hatred could only be conquered by love and forgiveness. Forgive, not for anybody else, but for your own inner peace. Yes, you’ve heard that a million times before, but just can’t seem to get yourself to forgive. Don’t worry…It took me a while to realize this…maybe it’d take time for you too. And it’s okay.
- It’s okay to have problems. Everybody has their own share and when you solve a set of problems today, a new set will take their place tomorrow. So, don’t be disappointed when you have to deal with problems. Learn to expect them and accept them as a part of your life. Life will be easier that way.
- No matter whatever happens in life, it will be okay. Even though, in the moment, you might feel there’s nothing left for you to live for. But, you will and then you’ll realize that it’s been okay all this while and that it will be in the future too!
Just, keep going…
Image credit: https://unsplash.com/photos/gldl0JIQz7Q